tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1521275149783485826.post6694978129461676805..comments2023-05-01T02:05:21.190-07:00Comments on Reasons to Stay LDS (even though you don't believe in the Church anymore.): # 42: The Church Reinforces Proper Gender Rolesmisterfake371http://www.blogger.com/profile/07971233237329366968noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1521275149783485826.post-56288092649161136252015-11-12T18:55:56.454-08:002015-11-12T18:55:56.454-08:00Hey anonymous, I actually read your comment a long...Hey anonymous, I actually read your comment a long time ago, but I didn't respond, because I didn't know what to say. I still don't know what to say. I just wanted to let you know, if you're even reading this, that I read and thought about your comment. <br /><br />I'm not an ecclesiastical leader or a counselor or anything like that. I have a blue collar job in the manufacturing industry. So, I don't know how to help you, except to say that God loves you, and I hope that you continue to believe in God. I find so much truth and beauty and goodness in the LDS Church, so that's why I stick with it. Heavenly Father does not hate you. He loves you. <br /><br />Maybe you can try to stop thinking so much about what others think about you. Maybe you can spend some quality time alone, in prayer, or not even in prayer. Just remember that God is your only judge. Your ward members and your church leaders are not your judges. God cares more about the goodness of your heart than the clothes you wear.<br /><br />Also, try to lose yourself in the service of others. I love the scripture, "he that findeth his life shall lose it, and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it." Sometimes it's helpful to think less about yourself and your own particular sexual orientation or identity and to think of others and their needs.<br /><br />I'm not sure you were asking for advice, but, what the heck, I gave it to you anyway. I know you posted your comment in September, and now it's November, but it's better late than never. <br /><br />See you later.misterfake371https://www.blogger.com/profile/07971233237329366968noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1521275149783485826.post-31205587096186919592015-09-23T20:14:59.058-07:002015-09-23T20:14:59.058-07:00I realize where you're coming from. I really d...I realize where you're coming from. I really do. But some of us are just really confused. I am a person who is genuinely confused. I cannot get a temple recommend even though I am a good person and I am a strong member of the church. Because I don't adhere to the appropriate gender role. I am a female. I was born in a female's body and I understand that I have eternally been a female since before I was born. But I am not an 'appropriate' female. I like men. But I am not an 'appropriate' female. I do not get dates, and I will most likely not be married. Because I look like a male, and I feel comfortable in men's attire. But I am a female. When I pretend to be an 'appropriate' female, I hate myself. I become depressed. I have tried in the past to commit suicide because I hate myself so much. My bishop has no words for me because he doesn't know what to do except deny me temple blessings because what I am is not sanctioned by the church. The boys in my singles ward ignore me, and the girls try to force me into 'makeovers', which end up making me feel fake and tired and even more depressed. What about those of us like me? Does Heavenly Father hate me so much that he wants me to be miserable just so I can adhere to the qualifications? I've been told that he loves me...just not for the way I am. I must be a certain way to get into the Celestial kingdom. And no matter what I do, that will be the catalyst that keeps me from exaltation. I love this church and it's teachings so much. And the sad part is that we have no help. All we have is people telling us to be this way, or get out. But they'll still love us on our way to utter damnation in the lower kingdoms. <br />Why not post something about that? Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1521275149783485826.post-55471074148224230002014-04-25T19:55:16.560-07:002014-04-25T19:55:16.560-07:00Thanks for the rant. I sympathize with you. That...Thanks for the rant. I sympathize with you. That seems like a frustrating situation, and it does seem inappropriate that they're discussing a kid's masturbation habits in a big group setting like that. Is there something in the Church Handbook of Instructions about keeping private stuff private? If so, maybe you could bring that up to somebody. I guess we need to keep saying to ourselves, "The stake high council is just trying to help." misterfake371https://www.blogger.com/profile/07971233237329366968noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1521275149783485826.post-33747170353708937352014-04-25T12:29:18.981-07:002014-04-25T12:29:18.981-07:00So my calling is Stake Executive Sec and so I'...So my calling is Stake Executive Sec and so I'm constantly surrounded by TBM and they often say things that bug me SOO bad!! So, since you're kind of a non-believing-yet-still-active member i'm going to rant on here. In Stake Council meeting (includes men and women in stake leadership), each High Councilor was reporting on some individuals in their ward. One brought up a guy, BY NAME, who was struggling to gain a temple recommend. The Stake President, asked for specifics as to his obstacles. The HC responded sheepishly, "Masturbation. He goes for about a month or two and then messes up again. The bishop told him he needs to go three months and then he can get one." I was sitting there in shock. First, why are they talking about this poor kid's personal struggles, which he confessed in confidence? Secondly, the kid probably is way worthier than thousands of people who go to the temple regularly. And last the temple's purpose, although I don't believe in it anymore, should be to strengthen people just like this kid. Another reason I think so many people are falling away. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com